Do You Know How to Break Up With Someone?





With Valentine’s Day in our rear view mirrors, it’s probably appropriate to talk about the art of breaking up (hee hee).  You could say that recent events in my own life have made me stop and think about why breaking up is so hard to do.  I personally commend all of those heartless men and women out there who have the ability to sever ties and not look back. Me?  I’m like that puppy that knows when you’re going out of town and all they do is whimper and cry as you pack your bags, as if it will change someone’s mind.  I mean, call it separation anxiety or being a softy, but I just don’t break up with people…I just CAN’T do it!


So, here’s MY deal.  I get so attached to people, I invest all of my energy into someone that when the time comes and the dreadful downward spiral begins, it just seems impossible.  It honestly feels like breaking up would be the equivalent of not having an arm or not being able to breathe…you just can’t imagine that, right?


Can you break up with someone? How do you do it? Is it this insane build up of awkward exchanges then one day you finally break and blurt out, “YOU CAN’T SIT WITH US?!” like in the movie Mean Girls?  Or do you just distance yourself until the other person breaks up with you so that you don’t have to do the dirty work? Or do you just disappear and hope that no one notices?    I’m sure someONE must have the answers…right?


Far too often relationships feel like a chore and from a very young age, many of us have heard relationships take work and love is hard.  But, I’m not so sure that’s true. If two people are in love, sure, there will be tough times, but shouldn’t it be the ONE thing in life that you don’t have to work at?  Shouldn’t it be that “gimme” from God that’s just not too hard?  Maybe if being with someone was understood to be just a temporary “thing” then ending it wouldn’t be such a difficult task.  At some point I’m sure I’ll have to grow up and put my big girl panties on and learn how to do the breaking up thing, but for now I’ll let the grown-ups master that art.  I’m OK with being an incapable 32-year-old sucker!