Can You Call it Support When it’s Done from the Shadows?

It’s been such an exciting time in my life, getting the chance to take a sneak peak into the lives of others, some complete strangers.  However, it seems fitting to take a step back and say “hello” to my readers and share a story.  In anyone’s life, there are highs and there are not-so-highs (better than saying lows), but there are lessons in everything that we go through.  I’ve decided to share one of the lessons that I came away with, with all of you…maybe you can let me know your take on it.  Before I begin, my question to you is: What’s your idea of showing support?

When you put your thoughts, your craft, your goal(s) on display for the world to see (and critique) that can be scary, as I’ve mentioned in previous posts.  One thing that can help someone work through the anxiety and pressure is the support of others (friends, family, significant other, etc.).  There is NOTHING that can replace a “good job” or “great post” or “wow! your site is so cool” or “amazing interview”…you get the point!  You want to know that the people you hold close are out there taking time to “support” you in your endeavor.  How would you feel if, someone that you were really close to, supported from the “shadows” in a place where you couldn’t see or recognize it?  Would that support still count?  Would you still call it “support” if you didn’t know that they were even giving it to you?  That’s exactly what happened to me.  I won’t use any names, we’ll call them Dasher, but the person reading this from the shadows, will know that this is about them (keep in mind, I can’t tell who is reading my blog, unless they tell me directly or they leave a comment).  Dasher expressed that leaving a comment on my blog is my way of wanting “their presence to be known to everybody” when I already know they are the “type of person who lives in the shadows.” So, basically it’s wrong for me to expect them to do such a thing when I already know it’s not in their nature.  

Here’s my take on it.  What the f**k does that mean? I secretly laughed out loud in shock.  Something about that is just plain old conceited.  To think, they believe the only reason I want them to leave a comment or show me they are there, is because I want THEIR presence to be known.  HA!  As if!  This is really what it’s about…read and pay attention!  When I care about someone enough to spend time with them, share moments, or even talk to them, or call them my friend, that automatically makes them somewhat special to me because I don’t do that, with or for, just anyone.  As I draw closer to them and build trust, there’s no hiding that they are special…my light naturally shines through.  When you have that inner light shining, there’s no such thing as living in the shadows.  Therefore, whatever they are working on or pursuing, I naturally want to let them know, “I support you!”   It may not be every day, but at some point I will show my support OUTWARDLY and not because I want the world (a.k.a. “everybody”, as Dasher said) to see, but because I would be so proud.

The Lesson I Learned: Not everyone shows support in the same way, that’s fine.  However, it’s crucial to let those you love and care about, know that you recognize their efforts and success. 

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Posted on March 10, 2012, in Friendships, Love, Relationships, Self-Love, Selfless Acts, Soul Searching and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Marcus Brewster

    I’m eith you Dani. I mean you don’t have to sound a trumpet, but I mean show a little support out there for me. If you in my corner and can’t do it, how will I have confidence that the rest of the world will support me.

  2. Congrats on the blog, the success and the lesson. Conceited? Ego? It takes a small mind to think 2 words (nice job or good post, etc.) in a comment box on a blog bruises an ego. Support isn’t always defined by how a person is but what a person does.

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